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October 6, 2004
Buying a 40
Buying a 40 with nothing but quarters is bad form. I've never done that because I'm too classy, but some other guy I know needed a 40 for the debate last night and he did it. It wasn't me.
The problem is that 40's in the city are too expensive for change-payers. ($3.25) Now I'm not a very good judge of how many quarters that is exactly, but if I had to guess I'd say that its about 27 quarters.
Its an embarrassment to hand the cashier a gi-normous bottle of beer and then reach into your pocket with the other hand to find proper change. You're one step away from a cardboard box and a shopping cart full of cans, and eye contact is out of the question.
Stare at your feet.
If you're lucky he will take your word that the change is correct and quickly throw it into the drawer, sparing you any further embarrassment. If you are not a lucky man, such as my friend, he will doubt you and spread the change out across the counter (thus the name; counter) and begin slowly sifting through it just as an attractive young lady sidles up next to you in line.
Stare at your feet.
Do not make a comment to the woman in an attempt to distract her from what is happening.
Posted by K